I've officially been here for a month. That's 8 months of my stay here left to go. It's been a rough month with lots of money spent on starting up, mistakes made on buying food and my refusal to accept that I should be living for Finland and Erasmus rather than obsessing about what's going on at home. Few lessons have been learned, all of them valuable in life!
I don't mind cleaning plates and whatnot now. Crucially, I don't mind cleaning other peoples' plates and glasses. With their food on them. I'm one of those people who finds other peoples' food both sacred (do not touch) and disgusting (do not touch!!!) but now I don't mind. We have to stay on top of cleaning dishes and saucepans and all that and of course cutlery. The place would fall apart otherwise, and me with it.
Washing my clothes is so easy and whatnot and indeed more satisfying. I do not mind washing my clothes in the communal laundry. I do not mind having to book two hour slots for a tiny machine. I do not mind the idea of buying detergent every few weeks. I do not mind the idea of doing multiple loads every week. I can do this now, I can do this for life. I also always loved drying clothes but it feels more worth it now to use the drier and wear the clothes afterwards. So warm and toasty!
I am sick of this 5 month vacation. I haven't had college since March and my exams were finished by May. So technically I haven't been to a lecture in 7 months. I miss the structure of my day that I used to have. It's only around the time I was in Leaving Cert did I start to get sick of the summer dragging on for July and August. Now I feel that sensation again. I want my structured day of eating, coffee, lectures, work and study that I used to have. I am much more conducive to society that way than I am now! Even when it starts, I'll still have only 8 hours a week. But I'll study for around 20 hours a week, so it should balance out!
I've resigned myself to the fact that I'm not in Ireland any more, I should stop fussing about the drama and the politics. I am absolutely sickened by the actions of some people but I suppose I can't blame them too harshly. I figure that my return will be less celebrated than I used to think, so I must make the most of now. There are two drinking parties on Thursday and Friday, so that should keep me going. I'll try and distance myself from Ireland as best as possible, saving my time for only the very best of friends who aren't just the friends who stayed about the longest, but the ones who never left me. There will be showdown in either December-January or March I'd say, when I'm back for a time. After that, nothing left to do but finish Final Year in relative peace and then leave that country when I can.
I can barely imagine what it'll be like after March and May at the latest. I have something very important to take care of from there on out, but I don't know how that'll pan out. I also have someone that I've built my life around and I hope they don't go on me. She is visiting me here next Monday, so we'll see how that goes!
A month in and I'm doing fine. I can only do better, despite the cold an the darkness that is coming. At this rate, I can totally do this!